I don't think I'm the only one who's really hoping that 2022 is significantly different.
2021 and 2020 certainly have been a time of incredible change. And I know that for many of you, it's been some ups and some downs. Today I wanted to talk about trusting the niggle and telling the truth. And sometimes it's about telling the truth and sometimes it's about trusting the niggle.
If you are new to the blog, welcome. Let me explain what I mean by the word "niggle". Niggle is a niggle, such an annoying feeling; sometimes it's a sensation you feel in your body, but it's basically, a very clear indicator from your higher self or your soul or whatever you want to call it.
that indicates that you need to be doing or saying something different than you are right now. It's usually a pretty good warning.
If you have looked at my story at all, which of course you can find on my website. You will see that I made a couple of doozies of bad decisions in my life. And all of that was because I wasn't listening to the niggles. That "something" went off inside of me that said, this is not the right thing for you. "He's bad news". "Don't make that business deal". You name it. And I ignored it. And I think that's a pretty common experience, especially for women.
And the telling the truth part... When I started telling myself the truth about my life, when I got honest with myself about it all... When I was finally honest with myself that I am my own worst enemy and that I don't always do a good job of taking care of myself, that's the moment when my life really started to shift in a different direction.
I know right now everyone is doing a blog about goals, whether it's "smart" goals or something similar. Specific, measurable, accountable/actionable with a timeline, right? There is a whole system to setting a goal to make it more achievable.
And if you are someone who is looking for a different way to do your vision board, I've actually written a very short, very simple "How to do a vision board" that's different than this traditional take on the vision board with the cut-out clip art images. Not that I think those are bad, but for me, those kinds of vision boards were surface level, and they were not delivering the kind of results I wanted.
I detail that in the book. I was cutting out pictures of houses that I never really expected to have. I was cutting out jewelry that I never really expected to have a place to wear. And I realized, it wasn't really my "ideal" body in the picture so, for me, it felt very surface level. I did a really big, deep dive on what I wanted to do, where I wanted to go and who I wanted to be... I've shared that systematic thought process with you in the book.
Grab your copy here: A Simple Little How-To Vision Board Book for Big Dreamers.
It's only $8.00 CAD or $5.00 for the Kindle version. I wanted to make it really accessible to people because I always get asked "how", "how did you accomplish this"? "How'd you continue to accomplish it"? "How did you move past $350,000 worth of debt", " find new love"? I've put all of that in there.
BUT, I'm not going to go into that today.
I wanted to talk about self-worth, because I really don't you need another goal setting podcast or blog or even book. You don't need another vision board class, you don't need another, coach or mentor or how-to plan. You just need to believe in yourself. You need to get some self-worth sister.
When we don't have self-worth, we set goals that we don't really believe in that aren't really aligned with our purpose and our mission, which can be as simple as I want it to be the best mom possible, or I want to be the best human possible.
If we don't have a sense of self-worth, if we don't put ourselves first, if we're not willing to know where we need boundaries and set great boundaries, or if we're not honest with ourselves about who we are and where our strengths are, and our weaknesses are then I think we have a tendency to just go with the flow.
And going with the flow can be a really good thing. Let's be honest. We want to live in the flow, especially if we're living in our feminine, it's all about the flow. It's about accepting and being in the moment. And really "the moment" is the place we have any kind of power to make change.
I'm talking about being PRESENT with yourself. That's one of my words, by the way, for the year is presence. And here's why, if I'm in the moment and I'm really present with either the person I'm with, with the thing that I'm doing - it is then, and only then, that I'm able to bring my very best to that moment. Your capacity to cope or create is also increased when you become present.
If you've followed my journey, then you know that one of my number one challenges is to actually getting my own goals and living the life that I really believe I am capable of is dealing with distractions.
I love to be involved in create ideas, concepts, and plans. It's really easy for me to see the new sparkling, beautiful, exciting thing and get distracted by that rather than staying the course on my goals.
Because let's be honest. Most of life and getting to your goals, is relatively boring and not very interesting or very exciting. It is more about consistency, practice and discipline.
So how do you persevere through the boredom? I think its
Here is a question I have for you. Are you starting off 2022 loving yourself? I've been asking myself this recently and I go further into this question in this blog post here.
You're not where you want to be. And I'm not where I want to be. And is that because we just don't really believe in ourselves?
Do you need another system to make your goals? Maybe.
Truth moment. I have not been setting goals the way I did years ago. I've had a tough few years, who hasn't? I kind of got lazy. I have had success. I'm proud of where I am, but it's been a long time since I put numbers, dates and timelines on my goals.
I knew in my own heart and mind that I wasn't living up to who I could be. I was playing small. I had a fear of success.
I was also afraid to be known because sometimes people know a version of you that doesn't exist anymore. They say, "well, I knew her when...", when the reality is that we're all allowed to change. We're all allowed to shift.
In fact, I hope we are all changing, every day and every year for the better! I hope that we can give, each other, the opportunity to become all that we might be. Thank goodness we are not who we were when we were 10 or when we were 16, or when we were 21. Thank goodness we're growing into better and bigger people all the time.
But how much of you not actually getting your goals or your resolutions is because you actually don’t really love you?
I have lost faith in myself too. But if I really love myself, then I would be going after this life that I want. If I really loved myself, then you can bet, I would be betting on myself every single day, every single time, allowing myself grace (I'm a mom of two now!), but I would really be going after it.
So here are some final thoughts as I wrap this up.
1) Don't let the how get in the way of you reaching your goals.
(Grab a copy of my book to help with that here)
2) Ask yourself the same question I'm asking myself. "What if this year as I make a plan and take action on the plan, I do so with a deep sense of self love. Leaning more on my own deep sense of self worth and joy in a life well lived as the means to move me to and through my goals to achievement. Then, would I and could I finally accomplish all that I can see in my mind's eye and believe to be true for me?"
Just a thought.
Link for corresponding podcast on this same idea.
Need a gratitude journal to daily note the reasons you love yourself? Click here for our New 365 Daily Gratitude Journals.